Rolen Back History

I think we can safely say that the 2000s were the best decade ever to be a Phillies fan. Actually, that’s not true, because 1975-1984 probably has it beat. Let’s compare the two eras:

Era 1975-1984 2000-2009
Record 872-693 850-769
Win pct. .557 .525
Playoff Appearances 6 3
Division Titles 5 3
Pennants 2 2
WS Titles 1 1
Winning Seasons 9 (plus an 81-81 season) 8
Major Awards* (ROY, MVP, Cy Young, Manager of the Year) 5 4
Best Record 101-61 (1976 and 1977) 93-69 (2009)
Worst Record 81-81 (1984) 65-97 (2000)

Now, all of this could change with another winning season and division title or pennant next year, plus a Cy Young for Roy Halladay or another MVP for Howard (or a first one for Chase Utley) isn’t out of the question.

I say this because even though the past 10 years have been great, they could have been much, much better, once you consider one of the greatest “What If?” questions in Phillies history. I’ve been arguing this in social settings for years, but never really crystallized the argument. Until now. Continue reading

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Utley as Sin

Bill James once wrote that having a fire hydrant body was an asset in baseball, or at least there were very few bad pro baseball players with that type. By fire hydrant body he meant long torso, short arms and short legs. I don’t know if this is true or not (after all, the spindly Jayson Werth is a pretty good player, and long-armed pitchers get more leverage, etc.), but it reminded me of a certain Phillies player. Continue reading

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On Girls With Low Self-Esteem and Flawed Free Agents

When I was in high school, I wasn’t exactly a hot ticket. I mean, I was tall and a guitarist (I still am both of those things, incidentally)…aaaand that was about all I had going for me in terms of landing the proverbial hot chicks.

I had braces until halfway through my junior year. I took all AP classes, and spent a lot of time doing homework. While my high school’s social hierarchy was based largely on how much money your parents gave you to spend, my parents never really had a tremendous amount of money, and not a whole lot of that trickled down to me for my own personal entertainment.

Let’s put it this way: being in marching band in high school is bad enough, being drum major for two years just about kills any chance you have of dating hot girls. And just to make sure I was consigned to the social underbelly of the school, I played clarinet and did three years of academic challenge.

What I learned from this experience is the value of buying low and selling high.

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Filed under General Bull, Offseason 2009-10

Ho Ho Ho

Here’s to being glad the only team that has Cole in their stocking is the Phillies.

And here’s to hoping you had a wonderful holiday with loved ones.

We’ll be back, probably after the new year. Be safe, live red.

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Werth’s…Value

It would probably be fair to classify the 2010 season as the beginning of a transitional period in the history of the Phillies.

One piece has already been addressed, with Ruben Amaro having traded for and signed a legitimately elite starter for the next four seasons. Another, slightly less important cog has been WD-40ed, with Placido Polanco replacing Pedro Feliz for the next three seasons. What looms in the future are more pivotal decisions that, if correctly addressed, will keep the Phillies among the National League’s elite teams for years to come.

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Phillies Fantasy Drafting Guide: Hitters

Maybe it’s too small a sample for me to speak in general terms, but a lot of Phillies fans seem to give extra preference to hometown players when assembling their fantasy baseball squads. Hey, if you’re not a seamhead, go with what you know. I can dig it.

But for the sake of your team’s success, you may be able to put off drafting a Philly player by a round or two, sometimes more. Where do the Phillies’ bright stars rank among the rest of baseball’s fantasy studs? Where should you feel most comfortable taking Cole Hamels? Is Jimmy Rollins still a top five shortstop?

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Good Old Fashioned Lover Roy

Ok, so I’ll admit, I’m still trying to make sense out of the Roy Halladay trade, and it’s been a while since I’ve had a tortured extended metaphor. So I think it’s time to do something insane. Specifically, let’s honor the Phillies’ newest ace’s Mormon heritage by the following take on “fantasy draft”: if putting together 5 starting pitchers was like putting together 5 wives, what would it be like? I have therefore compared each Phillies starter (plus a couple other important trade chips) to a corresponding woman in this set of wives.

All images rated PG at most. I’m not that much of a misogynistic douche.

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